Saturday, February 24, 2018

Ah! Wish i was a man

  All the women/girl however strong and independent, they have atleast pondered, once in a while what is it to be man.And just wished that they were sometimes , out of sheer frustration "a man".Now all those feminist out there , i am one of you.But sometimes it hard to keep up the front.Trying to recount some of those for fun.
  When you realize that menstruation is something which will come every month, and all the boys in your class will not get it.When you suddenly have curfews to return home as you are adult now.You just wish you  were a boy.
   Then when you are over the moon due to getting a engineering seat , someone telling anyways you will end up leaving your job and cooking (Thanks to that Aunty, i never ever considered to marry a NRI !#careermatters) .Then there are instances when your Career choices are based on community advices (:D) .
     I had a friend who dreaded pay raise as she would become less sought after by supposed groom. I recall coaching her on this bullshit mentality. Would you imagine being unhappy on getting a raise? Would a man think like this? No wonder women in world over get paid less than their male counterpart.
   I myself was quite apprehensive of a 6 month maternity break. I wondered if i will lose in touch with my skills. However, this early realization led me to read and think. I binge watched TV and documentaries when i could find time. I read on things irrelevant things, basically let it go.Yes, the break impacts things, but i accepted it and moved on. It might have impacted the promotion i hankered after last year, but i have moved on from it and a realization that i really dint want that .I would sealed my fate  in management forever :) . Would a man thought anything about career or baby? They probably just look at it as 5 days break! <>
    And the men bonding in the smoke breaks are classic, I sometimes in my early career used to just pull my hair out of sheer frustration. A teammate and manager  discussed something with smoke and  assumed we all knew what they discussed. Well, let me tell you, these breaks did help that colleague in the long run. But, yeah karma is a bitch, hardwork matters in the end. I would  believe this till my last breath. I do have my super pessimistic days where i feel universe is out to get you :).
    I lived in NCR , i never really felt unsafe in real sense travelling alone etc..But, i my mind i was always cautious with cabbies, or just cautious. Do men have this subconscious need to be extra safe?  We hesitate to travel alone, well times are changing . I have interacted with super strong women who travel alone to amazing places.
   A relative had a 2nd girl .Imagine how they were congratulated, ah well, its in destiny another girl.But , the family was celebrating , i was happy to see.I just hate this suppressed congratulations. I had all girl names listed when i was expecting , so we scrambled to find a boy's name when he was born .Hope the boy doesnt read and feel depressed :P
     All i mean is , on our bad days we hanker to be a man. But, we are all happy to be what we are. Men need to give us space, respect. Times have changed, world is a better place i am happy to say.
   

Monday, January 01, 2018

Another year

            2017 is a year where i experienced the joy of waking up at midnight to appease a baby :P, was also a year of extreme reflection.We just need to purge the negativity from life and move on .There are things we can and cannot control. A fractured ankle is what reset my equilibrium and mental status. I was in a mode of extreme tension wrt to work. I just realized nobody really cares , work goes on , things don't stop. There will always be office politics. People will always be there to take advantage of your disadvantage , but that's just life.
          A baby certainly adds up to the equation called life. In the moment of extreme wonder , i just ponder on nature, how a tiny being gets your mannerisms and habits. You just cannot plan things to minute details as the baby is ever ready to change them for you.
    Career wise things were going great. Then the baby happened , despite all the feminist , all are equal-ism talks , i realized that they are just that. It certainly impacts , in my case it is a good thing. I am hoping 2018 to be a year of some major change.I need to focus on getting new skills .One of my mentor once said to have a secondary skills which can sustain you in life, i always wanted to do this. I did relearn trading and crypto trading during my break, made some money and plan to continue this.
     I am as usual thankful for the things i have, i am thankful to have a wonderful family and friends. I am thankful to my some wonderful colleagues. My mentors, who constantly make me think.  To that unknown entity called god, who pushes to rocky paths for testing you and making you a better version of yourself. A year passes by and we become more wiser and older . I hope i can strike the right cord on the things i planned, else there is another year :)

Monday, October 30, 2017

Life in time of social media

         Yes,, trying to copy from love in time of cholera.But mine seems less morbid title.But, i am not anti social media.I am on all active platforms and hooked on them.I was into facebook when it was new and exciting.Then followed google+, blogger, twitter, quora, wordpress, snapchat, watsapp etc etc..But, we move on from one to other , as there are too many options. Its easy to mindlessly get addicted to these. I however have become addicted to quora lately. I do update or look at facebook sparingly. I see now people have realized that they don't need to provide live update of their lives. Just new places, new additions, new dedications need to appear on social media. Some of my friends who posted almost everything have disappeared from social media.I have deactivated my facebook for couple days sometimes. But, just giving it up is too much! I do have subscribed to some fun pages and groups. I get a ton of information there, on things like fashion, food, charity, travel! So it has its own uses. However, few use it to copy others or stalk exes.
   I have been mindlessly been shopping online almost everyday, owe it to unable to go anywhere as i find it hard to travel with baby and India still doesn't even have space for feeding baby in restrooms.God forbid public breastfeeding ! I have been inspired by a person i follow on facebook (a CEO and avid traveller), who hasnot shopped the entire year ! Even when her last pair of running shoes were torn!I  have vowed to not shop anything for next 30 days(ofcourse diaper and baby stuff is excused :P ).
     Also, i read this inspiring story where a lady decided to not treat the children like "king and queen"  on watsapp.Basically most people buy children specific things like umbrella, small this , small that (all useless stuff).Why can't the child use what we use??Also, i had told my husband not to mindlessly get clothes for bub, which is good, few pairs of clothes and toys will get him to value what he has. I have lately seen children breaking expensive toys within seconds of getting those. I am not talking about breaking while playing, but just breaking for the sake of breaking! I can't say how bub will turn out, but i will try to steer him in right direction.
     Then there is another friend in Canada, she admirably is making organic stuff herself , she has a 4 month baby, works and has no help like in India! So, again people like these inspire you be a better version of yourself. So, social media has its own uses. Some people's post give you joy when you see their travel photos, children photos or their achievements.
     I can't forsake social media to make a statement.I have seen people giving it up and then going on and on  how they gave it up! Nobody cares, it your choice.Also, these days birthdays and festivals are no longer time to call and talk. Its just forward a photo and you are done with wishing someone. How i miss catching up and calling on festivals and birthdays. I did call until last year, i realized most people respond as if i am wasting their time :D, so i too just forward now. Some don't even call back and just message on some app, that too in times where voice calls are all time free! Sigh , maybe i was being to much of a relic of olden days, i am trying to change to modern times.